Pause and Reflect Aisha Khan

www.whitefalconpublishing.com All rights reserved First Edition, 2021 © Aisha Khan, 2021 Cover and Interior design by Aisha Khan, 2021 No part of this publication may be reproduced, or stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form by means of electronic, mechanical, photocopying or otherwise, without prior written permission from the author. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them. The author assumes no responsibility or liability whatsoever on behalf of the consumer or reader of this material. The resources in this book are provided for informational purposes only. Requests for permission should be addressed to [email protected] ISBN - 978-1-63640-161-4

Contents Acknowledgments……………………………….. 5 A letter to Readers………………………………..7 1. Art, Artists and one’s work……………….. 11 2. Education and Learning…………………… 21 3. Parents, Children, Society and the primary emotional needs of humans……………….. 27 4. The culture of today………………………. 41 5. Love and lovers…………………………… 55 6. Heartbreak………………………………... 73 7. Vulnerably present……………………….. 83 8. Reflective wanderings……………………. 91 9. Moments and feelings……………………. 101 10. Nature…………………………………… 115 11. The power of your existence…………….. 123

Acknowledgments To all the people who have believed in the gathering of my words, supported me in my journey and made this book possible today. To each and every one of my well-wishers who bless me with the most concentrated wishes. To each and every person who have been impacted by my words, to all of you who trust the power of vulnerability and trust me with your stories. To Apala and Vidhi, who have ever been so loving and supportive with their sincere wishes, who have always provided me with their thoughtful feedback on my writings, who thoroughly believed in me and earnestly wished for this book to take form, thank you for being my pillar of support and strength. To all the artists out there, who inspire others by being truthful and audacious with their way of storytelling. To all of you and to your sincere hearts, you have helped me in becoming the person I am today. I am grateful to have your presence in my life.

A Letter to Readers Dear Readers, Pause and Reflect, as the title suggests, spans the years of my life when I stopped to take a brief pause after college to reflect on my daily life, my state of upbringing, the culture and society I thrived in, in order to understand my own emotions, thoughts, reactions, and to ruminate on who I am as a person. Our whole life seems like we are caught up in a race, always moving, rushing about any place that occupies our hours, to avoid the embarrassment of being idle. Pacing from one phase of life to another, from school to college, to work and marriage, without having to give quality time to ourself to see where we are going… The title comes from the realization that in life, we have to take momentary pauses, to Reflect on the questions, feelings, emotions, experiences and moments we encounter in our daily routine. Pause and Reflect is a culmination of my understanding of one’s own self by being honest and laying bare my thoughts, feelings, emotions on paper, and also, it is an observation of the culture that we live in, focusing on all the spheres of our life that shapes us as Individuals. This book questions the need to focus on Self-knowledge, Self-awareness, which will help readers to bridge the gap of hollowness that comes from being unaware of one’s own self.

We bury certain emotions within us for fear of being judged, embarrassed and alone, there are some significant thoughts we keep to ourselves because we are unable to communicate these thoughts to others, our most important self, which is our authentic self, is hidden from the people around us. This book primarily focuses on the need of expressing the unexpressed self. It guides the readers slowly, with each lesson, to accept their uniqueness, to allow their authentic expression to take form, and to be unembarrassed by their most urgent longing. A sense of belongingness, is what our unexpressed self longs for, to find a safe space amongst others where we can share what’s truly inside us. The readers on my internet platform have been following me in my journey of honest expression, and they have come to me with the most heart warming wishes for my well-being, providing me with thoughtful, detailed feedbacks on my writings. For many, my writings have been an inspiration, a place where they resonate with my raw expression, a place where they find comfort and learn how to be in the moment. Some of these souls have accompanied me in my journey ever since the beginning, souls who are now like family to me. Dear readers, books, music, movies, artworks, quotes, articles, all these mediums have impacted me greatly. I owe my personal development and growth to all the artists out there, in every field, who have helped me in understanding and broadening my perspective so that I may conquer every major or minor battle in my life.

Being expressive about my story has led me in understanding myself, and in turn, has helped me in understanding the stories of others. There is a deep need in all of us to make sense of our life, to understand ourselves and the world around us, the uncertainty of not knowing, of not being aware disturbs us enormously. The very first step in understanding the situations and the world that surrounds us, is to first begin by understanding ourself and being honest with ourself. Come along with me, as I guide you with my own honest expression, so that you may find courage to accept your authentic self. This book will be your personal guide in helping you accept all the human parts of you. I do not intend to advice you, opine you, or ask of you to live in a certain way. Each individual’s life is unique, the solutions which can work for me, will not necessarily work for you. Pause and Reflect’s sole purpose is to help you visualize life in its entirety, in order that you may discover your own Truth.

Sincerely, lovingly,

Aisha Khan

Art, Artists and one’s work

12

A Fresh Difference of Change Creating a fresh difference of change, no matter how small, either by our work, or our way of living, Creation which can be recognized by our work, or simply by our lived example, no matter how insignificant that little change seems to us, A fresh difference of change, and that of creation, thrives to keep the beauty, hope & positivity of life alive… Little acts of kindness, of warmth and love, can linger on in our minds for years. We could be remembered by something huge we create, or by a tiny creation of ours which we unknowingly display in our daily lives. A toast to all the visible artists of the world, those who revolutionize the world with their work. A toast to all the invisible artists of the world, those who create little changes that goes unnoticed. A toast to all the visible and invisible artists of this world, their gathering weaves together the fabric of beauty, love, truth, compassion, joy, hope, faith & belief, alive in our hearts... And brings forth a gigantic masterpiece that liberates our soul. To all of us, and to our ‘small’ efforts to keep beauty thriving. To all of us, and to our insignificant creations of change, which makes a huge impact in the fabric of our world.

13

We are one Whatsoever you choose to see in me, you already have it within you. It could be anything. It could be that you relate to my way of being, my expression, my actions, my emotions, my feelings, my thoughts, etc… I am so much human than you, You are so much human than me, And us together, are much too human, living in the same world, going through experiences which vary on different levels, but on the human side, the multiple variations of us gets intertwined together, creating a bond of mutual understanding.

14

Work that matters I have come across innumerable artists who have created powerful pieces of art through their work. When I watch a film, or read a book, listen to a song, or observe a painting or a photograph, I am deeply impacted by the artist’s expression. Artists all over the world have provided to me through their works, a deep sense of belongingness, power, courage, hope & liberation. Simply by being themselves and owning their story, artists have put on display work that reaches the core within us. This is what life is for me. To be able to create through my work, a kind of impact which liberates the soul of the masses. Because that is precisely what Artists all over the world have bestowed upon me.

15

Music is a source of nourishment Music travels through generations and generations Melodies pass on, from one soul to another, and with it, a thousand memories come flooding to us. It’s as if the Divine Spirit knew that humans would require music to keep living. A song, when heard for the very first time, bestows upon humans’ innumerable feelings and emotions. Life would be bleak without this everlasting source of nourishment. The music plays, and alive comes our world each day… It’s such a sacred thing, one’s attachment to their music, a music band they’ll take to the grave. Each person has such powerful memories attached to their favourite music. Music consumes, captures the soul of humans, It shelters stories, memories, longings, for eons... nothing penetrates the soul like music does nothing evokes the spirit like music does If I had to thank the Gods for a blessing in my life that forever enriched my soul, It has to be Music. A place where souls feel free, pure, ethereal, untamed. Just you and the music. Only you with your music.