BALANCE by Danielle Iana P. Ocampo CHAPTER 1: Understanding Who I Am “The art of life is to know how to enjoy a little and to endure very much.” - William Hazlitt In the seventeen years that I have been living in this world, I can attest that life is indeed full of challenges. As I grow older and the responsibilities that come along with adulting are quickly catching up on me, I know that it will not get any easier. With that, I believe that balance is the key to truly seeing and appreciating the essence of life. Problems will keep on coming but allowing yourself to enjoy in the midst of the chaos is what will keep you grounded and inspire you to keep on enduring. I am Danielle Iana Padua Ocampo who, as much as she can, tries to attain the balance that she seeks in life by letting loose in its madness. I am the youngest child of Cecille and Norielle, and the youngest sibling of Dustin and Dominique. With the close bond I share with both my siblings, it was only natural for me to share the same interests as them. Kuya’s love for bands, and playing the piano and guitar rubbed off on me the same way that Ate’s fondness for photography and films had. Despite the huge influence of my family over me, I was still able to develop my own individuality through my likes and hobbies; these include my love for KPop and KDramas and doodling and drawing. Everything that I discovered about myself is a remnant of all the experiences, interactions, and developments I have come across. Having said that, these specific moments that include my physiological, cognitive, psychosocial, and moral developments played a big role in my journey to self-discovery.

CHAPTER 2: The Aspects of My Development PHYSIOLOGICAL (11 years old, Grade 6) “Mommy, ayoko na maging babae”, clutching on my aching lower abdomen with discomfort written all over my face, I told my mom as I experienced having my period for the first time. Waking up on that seemingly normal Saturday as an eleven-year-old girl excited for our Batch Night before our 6th grade graduation, I never expected for the situation that young girls like me were dreading, to come so soon. Despite the countless lessons about development and puberty taught in our health classes, nothing has fully equipped me for the monthly sufferings that I would be enduring for a lifetime. Uttering those words to my mom, she answered me with a chuckle, fondness present in her voice as she told me, “Sa una lang naman yan, hindi ka pa kasi sanay.” Honestly speaking, I did not feel even a bit of comfort with what Mom said, but looking back, it was the idea that she was able to endure all those red monthly visits that women encounter that made me accept my situation; that it’s going to happen either way, and that I’ll get used to the foreign feeling sooner or later.

ekis sa dysmenorr hea

COGNITIVE (15 years old, Grade 10)

After days of weighing the pros and cons, imagining scenarios of the different paths I can choose from, and deeply pondering upon whether I will transfer schools to continue my Senior High School education or not, I have finally reached my conclusion. It was a sunny afternoon in Bicol when I made my first ever major decision in the seventeen years of my existence. I decided that I wanted a change of environment and chose to study in a school with people I know nothing about in a city far from home. Studying in the same school ever since preschool, it was only natural for me to consider that place to be my comfort zone and second home. Although all that I have experienced molded the person that I am today, being coddled in the environment I grew accustomed to, I never really had to make huge decisions that could create such drastic changes in my life. The decisions I made were only constricted to superficial things such as deciding on what to buy in our cafeteria, deciding on dropping by McDonald’s before going home or not, or even as simple as choosing where to sit in our school bus. The moment I was sure of what I wanted for my next journey, I quickly called Mom and Dad who were both back in Manila to let them know of my choice. I was met with Mom’s “Sure ka na ba talaga diyan, anak?” and Dad asking me, “Bakit mo ba gustong lumipat? Explain mo lang, parang medyo biglaan kasi, ‘nak.” Even if they were skeptical at first, they gave me their support wholeheartedly and trusted that it was not a choice made out of impulse, but a choice made out of several sleepless nights and random moments of zoning out in the middle of the day.

PSYCHOSOCIAL (13 years old, Grade 8) With sections shuffling each year and my closest friends not being in the same class as I was, anxiousness was an understatement of how I felt on the first day of 8th grade. I was nervous that I would not fit in and would have no one to talk to. The idea that it was an opportunity to socialize and make new friends was not a thought I embraced with open arms. Nevertheless, it was during that same year that I found a second family in Sam, Elisha, Kirsten, Julianne, Chloe, Mary, and Rhyss, my classmates turned friends, who, until now are my biggest support system. October 28 was a date I vividly remember as it was the first sleepover that my parents allowed me to go to. I remember being so excited that I couldn’t bring myself to sleep the night before, the feeling was akin to a sugar rush even if I hadn’t consumed any sugar at all. On the night of the sleepover, our guards went down along the setting sun. The darkness of the night brought upon deep discussions none of us ever would have imagined we would open up about. We moved past talking about school and academics and even went as far as talking about how the uncertainty of the future was a scary thing to think of. It was also the first time I ever admitted my liking to both men and women out loud, which was met with support, acceptance, and numerous statements of “I’m proud of you”. The vulnerability we showed each other, showing our most raw and flawed selves, was what made our bond grow stronger.

MORAL (17 years old, Grade 12) Our Election Simulation performance task in our Philippine Politics and Governance class that happened during the second quarter was a testament of how I was able to develop my own values and morals. Even if it was only a simulation with no actual constituents to serve, our group poured our hearts into creating platforms that we thought a lot would benefit from if actually implemented. Due to the limited time we had to prepare with the Miting de Avance coinciding with our One-Act play, as a member who ran for the position of councilor, I could not help but feel nervous on the actual day because I felt like the preparations our group made was insufficient. My heart was racing fast as I was called in front to answer the question of my opponent; “What is your stance on same-sex marriage?”, they asked. I was able to answer the question with passion and conviction present in my voice as I got to voice out my thoughts and stance on the topic I advocated for the most. I don’t exactly remember what I said but they were along the lines of “Bakit natin ipagkakait ‘yon sa kanila? Wala naman silang ginagawang masama sa pagmamahal”. Despite how recently this event transpired, it became a significant experience in speaking up for what I think is right.

one act play mda umiyak

REFLECTION: I may have a myriad of memories I hold that are all a part of the puzzle pieces making up of who I am and who I am becoming, but these four stories I have shared are major contributions that shaped the Danielle that everyone knows now. These little fragments of the past continuously guide me as I continue to go through different developments and simultaneously live a stable and balanced life.

slayyyy

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