Table of Contents INTRODUCTION ............................................................................................................................................................... 3 HOW THE LOGISTICS WORK............................................................................................................................................. 4 WHAT YOU CAN EXPECT................................................................................................................................................... 4 COACHING QUESTIONS .................................................................................................................................................... 5 STEP ONE: What You Do Well........................................................................................................................................... 5 GENERAL...................................................................................................................................................................... 5 SPIRITUAL GIFTS .......................................................................................................................................................... 6 STRENGTHS ................................................................................................................................................................. 6 HOLLAND CAREER CODE............................................................................................................................................... 6 PERSONALITY: ENNEAGRAM & MBTI............................................................................................................................. 7 STEP TWO: Where & Who You Would Serve ...................................................................................................................... 8 PASSION ...................................................................................................................................................................... 8 PEOPLE........................................................................................................................................................................ 9 STEP THREE: Your Motivating Purpose ...........................................................................................................................10 VALUES.......................................................................................................................................................................10 STEP FOUR: Your Mission Statement...............................................................................................................................12 STEP FIVE: Staying Filled and Fulfilled...........................................................................................................................13

Welcome to a tool that will make your coaching toward clarity, peace and purpose easier than ever! INTRODUCTION By having your client use the CONNECT THE DOTS online training, it will consolidate and order critical insights that will bring them to great personal revelation and transformation. This guide is meant to give you tips, insights and recommendations to help you walk alongside them through this exploratory journey. The CONNECT THE DOTS online course makes selfexploration easy with a convenient assortment of tools and assessments all in one place! This self-paced online course invites God into the experience as they seek to uncover: WHAT THEY DO WELL WHO THEY’RE INCLINED TO SERVE WHAT MOTIVATES THEM HOW TO STAY FILLED & FULLFILLED They will discover how God built them to serve, gain clarity and direction regarding their purpose, and ascertain ways to stay filled and fulfilled as they live out their mission. Connect the Dots participants are saying “The assessments were all very helpful - I particularly liked the unique results from the Values Assessment. The entire course was insightful and empowering.” “The training allowed me to see my gifts and strengths in a whole new way. It made my dreams, gifts, and passions feel practical and attainable.” “I not only learned more about myself, but easily was able to turn my passions and purposes into practical steps that feel achievable and exciting.” “I got a good idea of where my heart leans, how God has gifted me, and how my talents and passions compliment each other to glorify God.” 3

HOW THE LOGISTICS WORK: This is designed to be CONVENIENT & EASY for you: 1. To get things started, simply email me at [email protected] to let me know you’re interested in using the tool with your clients. 2. If you haven’t already, you will receive the link to the CONNECT THE DOTS training and a code to access it for FREE. I highly recommend you experience the training yourself, so you can assist your clients with any questions. 3. You will also receive your own personal COUPON CODE to give to your clients. The code will give your client a $10 discount off the $35 course. Your code never changes, so it is easy to manage. It does time out after 5 years, at which time you can simply request an extension. 4. You will then share the link you receive with your clients. This is the direct link to the training. They will independently register, pay, and experience the course on their own. There are no backend administrative details you have to attend to. Just price, schedule and conduct your coaching sessions as you normally would! o You will also receive a generic thumbnail graphic for promotion and to post on your website. This resource positions you to serve your clients well with an effective, economical tool. It’s simple and easy to administrate, leaving you to do what you’re best at, coaching! WHAT YOU CAN EXPECT: SAFETY: Your client will be experiencing a training on a safe, secure training platform. You don’t need to be concerned about where you are sending them. LearnDesk is a reputable organization with over 100 million users in 191 countries. CONFIDENTIAL: Your client’s work will be totally confidential. They will download the CONNECT THE DOTS Matrix to their personal computer and complete it in total privacy. You will not learn of their results until they inform you. CHRISTIAN: The training is ecumenical and adheres to biblical values across denominations. Many of the assessments are secular, but the training is focused on arriving at their purpose according to how God made them. It is powerful to experience this journey with God, who ultimately holds everyone’s answers. PRICING: Price your coaching sessions as you normally would. No monetary compensation is due to me. Recommendations TIMING: Your client may either take 20 minutes to go through each step, or months, depending on how much reflecting they want to build in. Pacing is up to them and is impacted by how much time and energy they have available. I find you can approach it in several ways: • Step by Step: They can choose to complete one step a session. That makes it a 5-session coaching engagement. I find this ideal as they can walk through each step with you, as you bring the added value of the coach’s perspective. • All at once – REVIEW: This can be a single coaching session where your client synthesizes their information and formulates action steps with you to move forward. • Periodic check ins: If someone is having difficulty discovering their passion, you can allow time for investigation and life to happen by doing periodic coaching sessions at their preferred pace. I do not recommend longer than a monthly pace though. GROUP COACHING: A 5-session package works well with group and team coaching. 4

COACHING QUESTIONS Before you begin, realize that this is a huge undertaking for your client. Most of us take years finding our sweet spot or meaning, they will be receiving key revelations in only 5 sessions. Every Christians’ purpose is to glorify God, who is actually the one who moves your client closer to determining their unique God-given purpose. It is therefore critical to surrender the outcome to Him and to trust Him with the process. Pray to be the best coach you can be for them and allow God and your client do the rest. Throughout this guide are questions and strategies to keep in mind as you coach. They are listed in random order, pick and choose what will serve your client best. Remember that your client is the one who establishes their goal for each session. Their direction takes precedence. STEP ONE: What You Do Well Acknowledge that your client is the resident expert here. The information that they gain from assessments is self-reported, therefore as in any assessment, the client has final say about what they believe to be true about themselves. (Any disagreements they find with their results are good coaching opportunities.) No one is being locked into something, or pigeon holed into limitations or strengths. They are a dynamic, whole person made of body, mind, heart and soul. They make the final determinations, and you are there to honor that, or challenge aspects of it, if necessary. Step One reviews what they are good at. It is a collection of responses from assessments that identify their strengths. Most often, working with Christians, my experience has been that they have a hard time leaning into, or owning their strengths. Modesty and self-effacement can cloud truth in this step. I find giving them permission to receive any affirmed strengths will help them receive the truth better. Connecting their strengths to how God made them helps as well, especially when they realize they may grieve the Holy Spirit when diminishing themselves – a masterpiece in God’s eyes. For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Ephesians 2:10 Here are some questions you can consider as you begin the exploration: GENERAL Any surprises from your assessment results? What resonates most? What strengths and tendencies have been affirmed by others in your life? o Which are strongest/weakest? How do you think God uses what you do well? o How might He want to use it (now/future)? What is the most difficult/easiest strength to acknowledge and receive? o What makes that so? What’s getting it the way of you accepting that you’re good at ______________? o How does that play out in other areas of your life? Pulling everything together, how would you sum up what you are good at? o How true do you think that is about you? o How comfortable/uncomfortable does that feel? What truth do you need to hear from God to be comfortable with that? WHAT YOU DO WELL 5

SPIRITUAL GIFTS Spiritual gifts are different than skills and talents because we experience the Holy Spirit while doing them. In what spiritual gift do you most experience the Holy Spirit/or the presence of God? o Are there any spiritual gifts where you don’t experience God? [NOTE: That could just be a skill that has just presented itself on the assessment.] Are there any patterns or connections with how or when your spiritual gifts appear? Do you feel any different when experiencing one gift over another? Spiritual gifts are for others – it’s God using us to be the church to one another. In that context, which gifts really come alive and which ones might just be skills? Which gifts have been affirmed by others? What gift fulfills you the most? STRENGTHS Tell me what you understand about your strengths from your assessment results. Does any strength really stand out? An overused strength can become a weakness. Do you see any aspect of that with your strengths? Which strength is used the most/least? Where does that strength most appear and how do you use it? Where do you have the most impact with that strength? What would you consider a weakness? What do others say about your strengths/weaknesses? What do you think God thinks about your strengths? For what purpose do you see others using your top strengths? Does that sound inviting or not? HOLLAND CAREER CODE How was your initial reaction to your results? o Do you feel any different now? What do you wish was different, if at all? How has this vocational preference shown up in opportunities from your past? Are there any other vocational choices that you’d consider exploring more? How much has taking this assessment helped you see something new (or reaffirmed what you knew)? On a scale of 1 to 10 how comfortable might you feel in that professional setting? What do you think God might want you to do with this skill? What have your life experiences prepared you for? What types of roles feel life-giving? What types drain you? What would feel comfortable wearing at a job: uniform, suit, casual, etc.? What do you know wouldn’t be part of your ideal role or ideal life? What three things would be part of your best job – and three things that wouldn’t? What would be the perfect job description for you? 6

PERSONALITY: ENNEAGRAM & MBTI Your results describe you as an _________. How much do you identify with that description? How would a good friend describe you? What do you consider your most outstanding personality traits? o Are you okay with that? How can knowing these tendencies help you better identify your purpose? Are there any personality preferences that you consider challenging? o How might they be an obstacle to your journey here? What’s one part of your personality that you’d like to give to God? o What would you like back in return? By virtue of who you are personality-wise, what would be your greatest strength? o What could God do with that? How do you believe God sees you? What is His truth about you that may be difficult to receive? (good & bad). Is there anyone in the Bible who you most resonate with? Can you see God using you in similar ways? STEP ONE: What You Do Well - SUMMARY Prior to the session you can direct them to the Summary Template that is provided in the training. This will give them examples and ideas of how to pull together so much information. Before their coaching session they are supposed to complete a draft of their summary, based on their assessment results. In the event of any insights from your coaching session they may want to make some changes. You want them to select the top gifts and strengths that resonate with them, otherwise it gets ungainly. Help them to make the statement succinct and honest; without worrying about pride or self-aggrandizement. The point is to get truth onto paper – final wordsmithing comes in Step Four. 7

STEP TWO: Where & Who You Would Serve This step is an independent exploration of your client’s passion and the people they have a heart to serve. Depending on many factors, this step can be a real speed bump. Younger clients haven’t had a lot of life experiences to determine what breaks their heart, yet they feel a lot of pressure to be passionate about something. Although, too, they can be at the same time quite socially responsible and motivated to champion any trending cause that may not be their passion. Older clients may be so burned out from so many things in life, or years of not knowing, that connecting with a cause can be just as difficult. Helping each of them discern what and who really matters to them, is the goal of this coaching step. “Whatever you’ve done for the least of these, you’ve done for me.” Matthew 25:40 Here are awareness questions you can consider as you explore where & who they would serve: PASSION What’s really important to you? What are you most passionate about? o What does that look like in your life? What breaks your heart? What brings you the most joy? What makes your heart sing? What issues, injustices or causes bring up a righteous anger in you? What are the things that you have the most energy for? o Where do you think that energy comes from? What do you see in life that you want to fight for/against? o What are you willing to sacrifice for it? o What’s the cost of not pursuing it? What have you accomplished that you are most proud of? Who do you most admire, and why? Describe a legacy that would be most significant to you. What would be a deep regret if you never got to do? Have you experienced an unmet need that you would like to meet in others? What would that be? What do you see as the biggest inequity in the world? On a scale of 1-10 how willing are you to do something about it? WHO YOU SERVE 8

PEOPLE What type of people are you most drawn to? Why? Who do you feel is under-championed and under-supported? What age demographic do you best resonate with? o What gender? o What culture? What need do you most feel drawn to in the world? o Who does that impact the most? What type of people are you most comfortable with? What type of people do you have a keen understanding of? Describe the person you feel you could help the most. What demographic draws the most compassion from you? Where might God be challenging you? STEP TWO: Where & Who You Would Serve - SUMMARY Similar to Step One, your client will condense their findings into a statement and put it in the summary section of their Matrix before the session. Review their summary with them, highlight any new insights from the coaching session and have them determine any additions or edits. Identifying any people group is helpful to uncover any felt need that may resonate with them. This can lead to discovering their passion and provide an arena for them to serve. Note: Passions can change in life – the goal is not to merely extract a defined passion here, but to identify a passion, cause or joy that brings significant meaning into their life. If they come up short with a passion, they can still explore meaning. Sometimes the mundane, stable aspects of life are under-appreciated or dismissed, but a parent who worked responsibly to provide for their family is as, if not more than, important than saving whales. Giving them permission to have, what some may consider a less dynamic passion, is a gift. Coaching them to see the importance and shifting aspects of their passion and people is the goal along with God’s revelation. Help them to make the statement succinct and loaded with hope. 9

STEP THREE: Your Motivating Purpose Step Three explores their values. Values are the motivating force behind every decision they make. Additionally, values don’t operate independently, they have a pecking order where the #1 value calls the shots. Understanding how their values line up in relation to each other brings revelation and insights into why they do the things they do. The link this Step provides brings your client to my online values assessment on my website. This assessment has them select their values and then pit them against each other in order to determine the pecking order. [Note: I collect email addresses from anyone who takes my values assessment. After taking this assessment your client would become part of my email family and will receive occasional communications.] Additionally, I have a free Values Tutorial that I recommend you view. It is only around 7 minutes, but it walks you through the power of the values pecking order, as well as other aspects of how they impact our motivation. During coaching, I typically go through each word/value and have them define what it means to them. You can’t count on having the same understanding of a word – it’s best for them to bring it to life with their understanding. (For instance, TRAVEL could have many different meanings and applications. One client considered getting into his car and driving a freeing experience and therefore selected TRAVEL as a value.) Here are questions you can consider as you explore their motivating purpose: VALUES • What does __(VALUE)____ mean to you? o Why is that important to you? o What makes this valuable to you? o How might others see this play out in your life? o Are there any negative ways this plays out in your life? • What do you think of the order of your values? • How do you see this playing out in your life? • What major decisions have you made that you can attribute to the order of you values? • What might you overlook, or be tempted by with this order of values? • On a scale of 1 to 10, how honest were your word selections? o How much did “should” play into your choices? [Pressure to select values that aren’t their own.] • Values can change over time – how have you seen yours change, if at all? • What value gets you up in the morning? • What value energizes/drains you most? • What value challenges you the most? o What do you imagine God has to say about that? • What values would you sacrifice for? • How is this value uniquely you? YOUR MOTIVATION 10

• Where do you invest the best of your time, money and energy? [This explores if they are living their life in their values. If they are not, this is a coaching path.] o Why? o How does this relate to your values list? • Do you find your values shift between work, home and friends? [Values usually are consistent across the board. If not, they may not be themselves in these other areas. This is another coaching path.] • Describe how this value is reflected in your life right now? • Are these values ones that you think you should have, or ones that you actually live out? • How would your life characterize the values you live out? o Does it reflect this list or another? • Is this a value you’re living out already, or one that you aspire to? o Would you like to set this as one of your goals? • Is there any Scripture that best reflects your array of values? STEP THREE: Your Motivating Purpose - SUMMARY Help them to reflect the crux of their values that motivate and drive their life in a succinct sentence or two. Don’t feel pressured to use the actual words of their values. If there is meaning connected to them, consider using that. Helping them see the meaning that they desire in their life is powerful. “And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? Is anything worth more than your soul?” Matthew 16:26 11

STEP FOUR: Your Mission Statement Here is the space for them to copy and paste all their previous sentences in one place. They will do the work of this before their session. Help them to word-smith their meanings and impacts in ways that are powerful to them. This session includes exploration about their overall life purpose. Helping them to identify when to say yes and when to say no to things is important. Here are some general-purpose questions you can have them explore after completing the previous work. How do you feel about your mission statement? Does it feel comfortable/right? From this statement, what is your sense of God’s unique purpose for your life? What do you feel has been revealed to you about your destiny, call or meaning in your life? Who are the main people in your life who have/or influence your sense of call, destiny or meaning? o How can they help or hinder your efforts toward it? How does your family (or family history) impact your exploration of your purpose? o Is there anyone else with a similar calling or purpose in your family? Who has best influenced your sense of purpose? What did you already know about what you were made for, and how has all these revelations impacted that? What part does your relationship with God play in your sense of life purpose? How do you imagine God sees you living out this purpose? What Scripture comes to mind about your purpose? Is there anyone in the Bible that you most resonate with, regarding your purpose? What ways can you keep this statement top of mind? What was most challenging? What is most difficult to believe or receive? What could get in the way of you living out your mission statement? 12

STEP FIVE: Staying Filled and Fulfilled While identifying and living out one’s purpose is huge, an even greater challenge is staying filled and fulfilled as they live out their purpose. This Step helps them explore ways they stay connected to: • Others: Love Language - keeps their love tank filled. • God: Sacred Pathway Style - finding the best way to commune with God. • Themselves: Kingdom Impact Statement – their identity in Christ. We began this exploration with what your client can do, and we now end with a statement that crystalizes their identity in Christ…or who they are (or hope to be). With the Kingdom Impact Statement your client creates a truth that anchor’s their journey and their mission with a confidence that comes from God, about who He made them to be. This identity statement reflects aspects of their body, mind, heart and soul and helps to keep them on course. Above everything they have already done, identity is the most important piece. It is what informs their meaning and fills their days. Living out who they are in Christ daily helps them stay filled and fulfilled and turns them toward Jesus when they grow weary of doing good. In this step there is also a space to record Scripture that has helped them through this journey. Review with them God’s truth and coach ways to keep these truths alive daily. This Step is wholly about connection and self-care. This is the area in our lives that can slip away from us, because most of us don’t attend very well to it. In fact, we seldom realize our responsibility to do so. This Step is great to explore the results of their assessments and have them come to insights that can best lead them to stay filled and fulfilled. Finally, allow Father, Son and Holy Spirit to guide, inform and encourage them for the future as they walk out their mission with confidence. You satisfy me more than the richest feast. I will praise you with songs of joy. Psalm 63:5 Making a difference in the difference makers! It’s an honor to partner with you to make a difference in Jesus’ name. FILLED & FULFILLED 13

I thought I’d take a minute to tell you a bit about myself and hopefully instill some confidence with this tool. I am passionate about weaving emotional intelligence into spiritual growth and have spent decades searching for clarity, peace and purpose in disparate assessments and arbitrary insights. I created Connect the Dots so that others wouldn’t have to fumble through years of discovery to find their mission, like I did. Fortunately, I didn’t take this journey alone; I took it with God. This experience is meant to be taken with God, our Creator, the One who has called us to our purpose. While anyone can walk through this resource on their own, it is ideally meant to be experienced with a coach, and all the blessings that you bring. As I stumbled through this journey, I realized that as much as I needed to know who I was, I needed to know who God was even more. This became a dual effort; learning about myself and learning about Jesus. It is in this framework that we can only come to realize who we are in light of who He is. This is the blessing I found for myself and what has led me to become a Christian Coach. My hope is that this resource would bring everyone closer to Christ as He unfurls His revelations and love. In case you’re wondering… • My MISSION is to make a difference in the difference makers. • My VISION is to see emotionally smart and spiritually strong Christian leaders who are an irresistible witness of Christ. Here are the academic ways God has equipped me to produce this resource: • credentialed as a Certified Professional Life Coach, Group Coach & Team Coach by Christian Coach Institute • certified in emotional intelligence by MHS Systems • certified in Conflict Dynamics Profile by Eckerd College • qualified by the Association for Psychological Type in MBTI® personality types through CPP • trained by Peacemakers in conflict coaching • BetterUp! Coach: a transformational coaching platform that supports personal and professional growth. • graduate of Northeastern Illinois University • member: International Coaching Federation (ICF) • member: Christian Coaches Network International Thank you for blessing others through your mission of coaching! 14